I’m only 30.  I still feel young.  I still look young.  I have a better body now than I did at 22.

In any case, it’s come to my attention that I am old.  I’m out of touch with what the kids are doing.  I suddenly feel like I’m using a 14.4 modem with the internet slang out there.  Do kids these days even know what a modem is, er, was?  Oh, I remember when I upgraded to a 56.6……

Part of learning German lead me to — Germany’s version of MTV.  It’s the same show as in the States, with German subtitles.  Sweet.  Where could I find a show that speaks in slow sentence fragments?  Jersey Shore.  It’s much more interesting with the subtitles, because English does not translate into German perfectly. I like it in German, it’s simplified.  We use way too many words in English.  I’ve picked up useful phrase like, “Freue mich” which means “I am pleased” when someone says “nice to meet you.”  (And the “nice to meet you” is on a dance floor at a club.  Take it as you will.)  While I spent time in ROTC and the medical field, I’m quite used to acronyms.  They started throwing around DTF.  “This girl was so DTF.” The Germans translated it as “willing.”  Hmph.  Here I am, a native English speaker, googling my own language because I find something I can’t understand.  Yup, translated as “willing,” all right.  Wow.  If they were any more forward, they’d be in tomorrow.

My niece Martha, who just turned 13, posts on Facebook quite a bit, and today she posted, “Like my status for a TBH, pleeeeeze!!!”  After my Jersey Shore acronym debacle, I quickly googled it to figure out what it meant.  It means “To Be Honest” – so whomever “likes” her status, she will post on your wall something along the lines of, “tbh, you’re an amazing singer and you’re always there when I need someone to talk to, blah blah blah.”  Basically, you complement the person.  How freakin’ awesome, especially when you’re in middle school.  I suddenly felt like my mom when she found these different colored balls in my sister’s sock drawer – she thought they were designer drugs – my dad confirmed them to be paintballs.

To be honest, I don’t know what you mean.


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